Recently I've been looking for a place to live in the very expensive San Francisco rental market. Needless to say it's fairly exhausting and frustrating at the same time. Not only do we have to deal with outrageous pricing but we have to weed through an amazing amount of scam. Anyone who has been here and looked for a place to live knows very well what I'm talking about.
While searching the craigslist rental section for apartments and housing, I've found that about 3 in 5 ads are scams.
Here's how it works:
1) "The lure"..... advertising way lower than market price for an amazing place.
2) "The bait"..... beautiful pics and a seemingly plausible situation.
3) "The hook".... a rental application requiring everything about you including SSN for a "credit check" AND sometimes an application fee of which I've seen at $50.
Sounds fairly legit so far right? WRONG! Let's gaze a bit deeper into the mind of a complete dipshit-fuckhead shall we...
A) You can't meet with the landlord. How come? Because apparently they had to leave the country very suddenly to save the planet from complete and utter destruction.
B) You can't physically see your new home. Why? Evidently they live an extremely secluded life in which there was no one to leave the keys with. Yeah, San Francisco has no realtors that would help you. There are no neighbors around for miles. They have no friends or family (maybe they were tragically burned in a bus fire when it plunged into a giant lake of gasoline). Not even an acquaintance, general stranger, or even the homeless guy on the corner I see everyday panhandling for change. Surly they could find one of those. NOPE!
C) The grammar and overall structure of their response resembles something I might have written in Mrs. Curmudgeon's 2nd grade class (she was an old haggy BITCH by the way).
So, to all you Craigslist Scammers out there, I say unto you:
Stop the fucking insult on my already average intelligence by this ridiculous scam. I'd rather give my cash to the homeless guy on the corner. At least his tireless and painstaking efforts of panhandling for 4 months is deserving of the vacations he will take in Miami Beach from what I and my neighbors have given him.
FUYA Scammers! FUYA!
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