The Revolution Will NOT Be Televised

Years ago I was laying on the couch and got sucked into one of those cable TV show marathons. I sat through like six episodes of MTV's The Real World New Orleans in a ROW. Bleary eyed I suddenly realized I was just watching people LIVING. I couldn't think of anything more pathetic.

Everytime I think I have seen it all and can't be shocked anymore, something stupid like this pops up.

Fucking. Shoot. Me. Now.
--Beth

So You Think Your Kid's Bedroom is the Ritz Carlton? FUYA!

Air bnb is getting a lot of attention lately with talk of users not paying appropriate taxes or undermining the hotel industry but I have a different gripe... What was once a place for inexpensive traveling options that could also offer you the opportunity to live "like a local" is now creating a population of home owners who think their child's bedroom is the Ritz Carlton. Granted, I live in a hot tourist destination (Santa Barbara, CA) where hotels are expensive but seriously, what are these people thinking?!?

For an upcoming visit from my father and stepmom, my quaint one bedroom apartment would be space challenged for the three of us, so I turned to air bnb in the hopes of finding a larger place we could all stay for the weekend. Frustrated that the closest offer under $200 was more than 30 miles from the actual town in which I live, I withdrew my specification for an entire dwelling and found these gems:

• Your own room in a house share in which the couple actually living in the house slept on the living room couch
• A "cute" room in house share with a picture of bunk beds and children's toys all over the floor
• A "whole house" that consisted of an RV parked in the driveway:

Urban Camper in the heart of SB - Campers/RVs for Rent in Santa Barbara

				Urban Camper in the heart of SB - Campers/RVs for Rent i... Camper/RV in Santa Barbara, United States. GREAT location near the beach, downtown, zoo, Montecito, and trendy "Funk Zone". Camper has plenty of space to rela...
				View on www.airbnb.com	Preview by Yahoo

And my favorite, for $49 a night, a backyard camping deck. Yep, someone's outside deck on which you could set up your own tent. It over looked the house pool -- which you couldn't use -- so I guess you pay for a waterfront view.

Beautiful Outdoor Deck for Camping in Santa Barbara

				Beautiful Outdoor Deck for Camping in Santa Barbara Other in Santa Barbara, United States. Anyone like to camp, but find local SB sites difficult to reserve? We live on an acre lot and have a large deck that overlook...
				View on www.airbnb.com	Preview by Yahoo

These were the affordable rentals (all under $75) but there were many, many rooms in houses for $100 and up. And an additional cleaning fee. The local Motel 6, although not the most luxury of stays, was available for $99 a night this same weekend... a room you don't share with strangers, clean towels each day, a pool, and maid service included.

--Heather, guest blogger and special FUYA correspondent

This got me thinking about air bnb in general and how there must be shit like this posted in every city... came across a couple good links!

Worst Air bnb ever! 22 beds in one room. BYO sheets and 30 day minimum stay

Air bnb host comes home to an orgy in his house!

--Beth

But She Ripped Them Herself! Really!

NO, Amal Alamuddin aka Mrs. George Clooney, you do NOT get to wear shredded, torn jeans like a 1980s punk rock street urchin. I am not offended because you, a high powered British barrister, co-opted the thrift store look of my youth. I am appalled that the HUNDREDS of dollars you certainly paid for those jeans is more than most people's monthly rent. 

Fuck You All!

--Heather, guest blogger

Will Strip For Food

Driving home tonight I came up to a stoplight on Octavia Street and just outside my driver's side window, on the median, was a homeless guy taking off his clothes. Shirt, pants, undies. Quickly and matter-of-factly. Last of all, off came the socks. The clothes fell rumpled around his feet on the ground... he stood there very briefly, naked and un-afraid,  then started putting it all back on. The light turned green. I continued on.

I turned to the right and caught the eye of a guy in a car next to me. We both started laughing.

Fuck, I love this city.

--Beth

Fuck Off, We're Closed!

THAT'S RIGHT!

Seriously?

I have a neighbor who walks his two yapping schnauzers down my street -- the dogs go apeshit when they see other dogs. Pulling on their leases and barking up a fucking storm.

The other day I noticed that their owner wears EARPLUGS while he is walking them.

Seriously.

I think he should be passing earplugs OUT!!!

Free earplugs! Free earplugs!

3 Day Diarrhea

Saw this commercial the other night for "3 Day Refresh"... what a load of SHIT. Literally. There is no such thing as losing weight in 3 days. Unless you shit it out. I hate things like this that prey on overweight people's insecurities.

The 3-Day Refresh website boasts:

"A little ice cream here...
an extra slice of pizza there...

and before you know it, your jeans are too tight and you need a quick way to lose a few pounds and get back on track. Or maybe you're just finally ready to start a new weight loss program, and you want to jump into it with total commitment... "

So you buy their packets of fiber and drink some shakes for three days and viola!

NO thank$.

FUCK OFF ASSHOLES. 

Why spend $$ on this...

When you can buy some of these....

 

And lose some weight!